R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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