i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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