Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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