id be glad to
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize
