He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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