Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Randomize
