I molested 6 butterflies tonight
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
