I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
