Cold hands, warm shart.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
