You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
