what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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