So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
