well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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