If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
