Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
