I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Hippo gnu deer
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize
