At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
