Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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