i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
