The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
