Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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