I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
