The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
