why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize
