YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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