This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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