Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
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