Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Randomize
