i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Randomize
