You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
