Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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