Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize