Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
