I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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