I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
