it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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