Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
