PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
