That's intense
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
