Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
