he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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