remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize
