You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i was born a porn star she said
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
