I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
false alarm, still single
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
