then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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