Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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