im gay
i know
yea but for you.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Randomize
