we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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