We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
