I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
We got so high we made milksteak
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
